|
|||||||
|
|
|
|||||
|
|
|||||||
|
|||||||
|
|
|
|||||
|
|
|||||||
MURPHY'S LAWS
and Others Reasons Things Go Wrong
Page 1
MURPHOLOGY
If you find errors on these pages... it's to be expected
Murphy's Law
If anything can go wrong, it will.go wrong.
Corollaries:
1. Nothing is as easy as it looks.
2. Everything takes longer than you think.
3. If there is a possibility of several things goin wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.
4. If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way will promptly develop.
5. Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
6. Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.
7. Every solution breeds new problems.
8. It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.(and determined)
9. Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
The Murphy Philosophy:
Smile ... tomorrow will be worse.
Murphy's Constant:
Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.
Quantization Revision of Murphy's Law::
Everything goes wrong all at once.
Hill's Commentaries on Murphy's Law:
1. If we lose much by having things go wrong, take all possible care.
2. If we have nothing to lose by change, relax.
3. If we have everything to gain by change, relax.
4. If it doesn't matter, it does not matter.
O'Toole's Commentary on
Murphy's Law:Murphy was an optimist.
Zymurgy's Seventh Exception to Murphy's Law:
When it rains, it pours.
Boling's Postulate:
If you're feeling good, don't worry. You'll get over it.
White's Statement:
Don't lose heart ...
Owen's Commentary on White's Statement:
they might want to cut it out ...
Byrd's Addition to, Owen's Commentary onWhite's Statement:
... and they want to avoid a lengthy search.
Iles's Law:
There is always an easier way to do it.
Corollaries:
1. When looking directly at the easier way, especially for long periods, you will not see it.
Neither will Iles.
Chisholm's Second Law:
When things are going well, something will go wrong.
Corollaries:
1 . When things just can't get any worse, they will.
2. Anytime things appear to be going better, you have overlooked something.
Chisholm's Third Law:
Proposals, as understood by the proposer, will be judged otherwise by others.
Corollaries:
I. If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.
2. If You do something which you are sure wi meet with everybody's approval, somebody won't like it.
3. Procedures devised to implement the purpose won't quite work.
Scott's First Law:
No matter what goes wrong, it will probably look right.
Scott's Second Law:
When an error has been detected and corrected, it will be found to have been correct in the first place.
Corollary:
After the correction has been found in error it will be impossible to fit the original quantity back into the equation.
Finagles's First Law:
If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.
Finagles's Second Law:
No matter what the anticipated result, there will always be someone eager to:
(a) misinterpret it, (b) fake it, (c) believe it happened to his own pet theory
Finagles's Third Law:
In any collection of data, the figure most obviously correct, beyond all need of checking, is the mistake.
Corollaries:
1. No one whom you ask for help will see it.
2. Everyone who stops by with unsought advice will see it immediately.
Finagles's Fourth Law:
Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse.
Finagles's Rules:
1. To study a subject best, understand it thoroughly before you start.
2. Always keep a record of data - it indicates you've been working.
3. Always draw your curves, then plot your reading.
4. In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
S. Experiments should be reproducible -they should all fail in the same way.
6. Do not believe in miracles - rely on them.
Wingo's Axiom:
All Finagle Laws may be bypassed by learning the simple art of doing without thinking.
Gumperson's Law:
The probability of anythin happening is in inverse ratio to its desirability.
Issawi's Laws of Progress:
The Course of Progress:
Most things get steadily worse.
The Path of Progress:
A shortcut is the longest distance between two points.
The Dialectics of Progress:
Direct action produces direct reaction.
The Pace of Progress:
Society is a mule, not a car ... If pressed too hard, it will kick and throw off its rider.
Sodd's First Law:
When a person attempts a task, he or she will be thwarted in that task by the unconscious intervention of some other presence (animate or inanimate). Nevertheless, some tasks are coi-npleted, since the intervening presence is itself attempting a task and is, of course, subject to interference.
Sodd's Second Law:
Sooner or later, the worst possible set of circumstances is bound to occur.
Corollary:
Any system must be designed to withstand the worst possible set of circumstances.
Simon's Law:
Everything put together falls apart sooner or later.
Rubin's Law:
In crises that force people to choose among alternative courses of action, most people will choose the worst one possible.
Ginsberg's Theorem:
1. You can't win.
2. You can't break even.
3. You can't even quit the game.
Freeman's Commentary on Ginsberg's Theorem:
Every major philosophy that attempts to make life seem meaningful is based on the negation of one part of Ginsberg's Theorem. To wit:
1. Capitalism is based on the assumption that you can win.
2. Socialism is based on the assumption that you can break even.
3. Mysticism is based on the assumption that you can quit the game.
Ehrman's Commentary:
1. Things will get worse before they get better.
2. Who said things would get better?
Everrett's Second Law of Thermodynamics:
Confusion is always increasing in society. Only if someone or something works extremely hard can this confusion be reduced to order in a limited region. Nevertheless, this effort will still result in an increase in the total confusion of society at large.
Murphy's Law of Thermodynamics:
Things get worse under pressure.
Commoner's Second Law of Ecology:
Nothing ever goes away.
Pudder's Law:
Anything that begins well', ends badly.
Anything that begins badly, ends worse.
Stockmayer's Theorem:
If it looks easy, it's tough.
If it looks tough, it's damn well impossible.
Howe's Law:
Everyone has a scheme that will not work.
Wynne's Law:
Negative slack tends to increase.
Zymurgy's First Law of Evolving Systems Dynamics:
Once you open a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a larger can.
Sturgeon's Law:
90% of everything is crud.
The Unspeakable Law:
As soon as you mention something
if its good, it goes away-...
if it's bad, it happens.
Non-Reciprocal Laws of Expection
Negative expectations yield negative results.
Positive expectations yield negative results.
To Page 2 APPLIED MURPHOLOGY
As the laws are presented on my weekly e-mail list I will add them here. Come back each week or see them first by sending an e-mail to murphy-subscribe@topica.com
If you have other Murphy type "Laws"to add please E mail me
